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Most Popular Searches : Confidence - Sex - Cat And Mouse - Conversation - Flirting - Picking Up
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Letters ~ Got Questions?
You've got questions, The Player's got answers. Read the advice I've given to up-and-coming players on how to attract women. Send in your letter if you need help.
Fear Of Rejection
from Matt
Hi,

I just want to know if you can give me a few small tips. I can never seem to score with any good looking girls. My standards seem to be getting lower and lower!! I'm nervous and afraid to approach girls when I'm out and about because I'm afraid of what they will say about me and especially reject me. I always have to have had a few drinks to speak to girls and when I do I make a fool of myself whereas my friends can go and speak to any girl in the place with ease. I'm going out this weekend so if you could help me it would be great.

Anxiously awaiting your reply,
Matt


Hi Matt,

I know exactly where you are coming from, because you are exactly like I was before I became a player. Instead of setting your standards lower on the type of girls you go after, lower your standards on what they say to you when you approach them. What you have to do is just suck it up and go out looking to get rejected. Go up to the hottest girls you see and try talking to them and getting their numbers. If you go up to REALLY hot girls, you will almost get rejected every time, but that should be your goal. After getting rejected a few times you will realize that it is not that bad at all. Almost all girls will let you down rather lightly by saying something like "I've got a boyfriend", or even give you a fake phone number because they don't want to appear as a mean person.

Having a few drinks before approaching women is the exact reason why you are making a fool of yourself, and the exact reason why I never drink at all. Some guys think that they can mack better when they are drunk, but it is actually the opposite. Things you say when you are drunk may sound better to you at that moment, but if you were sober and listening to yourself you would not believe how stupid you sound. The only thing alcohol does is give you the balls to go up and initiate the conversation, but if you are used to getting rejected and know that it's not so bad, you will be able to approach with confidence. That is the key word, confidence.

Confidence is the most important thing to display when trying to attract women, because on the list of things that attracts women, confidence is nombre uno. The simple act of going up to a girl that you have never met before and striking up a conversation is a huge display of confidence. I have tested this many times by going out with some friends of mine that look much better than me, and each time I would go up to a group of hot girls, by myself before anyone else got the chance, and begin talking with them. This made me appear to the most confident in our group, in essence... the alpha male, and guess who ALL of the women wanted? By the end of the night I was able to choose whichever girl I desired.

After getting over your fear of rejection you will have no problem approaching girls, and once you have accomplished that, you will be able to practice talking to them which will make you a much better conversationalist with women. So here is my homework assignment for you...

While you are out and about this week, go up to five of the best looking girls that you see (only girls that you've never met before), and strike up a conversation with each one of them. Be ready to get rejected, and when you do, just smile and take it like a man, you will notice that it will actually feel good because you've achieved your goal, which was not to get her number, but rather to get up the balls to talk to a drop-dead gorgeous girl while you were completely sober. Here are some things to remember while you are doing this...

1. When you approach them, SMILE A LOT. Nothing can make you seem more attractive than a smile.

2. Don't just ask for her number, open up with a simple "Hi, I'm Matt" which is the absolute best opening statement you could use.

3. If you can't thing of anything unique to say to her, ask for her opinion of something. For instance, say something along the lines of "I'm thinking about buying this new cologne, but first I want to find out if it will attract beautiful women, so would you tell me if this smell would attract you". Make sure you've got a tester bottle of cologne, which you can get at any department store for free, I recommend Acqua Di Gio by Armani because women simply love that cologne, which will make the women you approach think you've got really good taste.

Hope this helps, let me know if you've got any other questions and how things are going after you try talking to a few women.

Good luck,

-The Player


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