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How much do girls care about looks?


So, do girls care about looks?

Unless you look like a male model, there have probably been plenty of times in your life when you’ve sat back and wondered: “Seriously, how much do girls care about looks?”

There’s no shame in that.

I’m guilty of asking that same question myself, which is obvious since I took the time to thoroughly research the subject and figure out the real truth, then write this article about it.

Well, as a man the answer to that question is something that is pretty hard to wrap your head around, because when it comes to looks men and women have entirely different patterns of thought.

The thing about male thinking is that we tend to use comparative logic. What this means is that in order to analyze something, men generally draw comparisons to something more familiar to us in order to better comprehend the situation or thing we are currently dealing with.

Have you ever found yourself taking a longer route while driving just because you wanted to take roads you were familiar with?

Can you remember a time when you met a girl and when hearing her name you pictured another girl you knew with the same name?

It’s because we’re comparative thinkers and highly competitive beings, which is only natural and logical due to our evolution. Back in our days in the wild we needed to be able to accurately size up a competing male – or a threatening animal – in comparison to ourselves.

This survival instinct helped us to properly decide if we should fight or flee.

Women don’t think this way because they never had to, so they evolved differently. They are also inherently much less competitive than men are.

Girls don’t say: “I’m fatter than her.”

They say: “I’m fat.”

Girls don’t say: “She’s prettier than me.”

They say: “She’s so pretty.”

This is because women think in terms that are relative to that individual.

Whereas us men think in terms that are comparative to everyone else.

How does this apply to looks?

A man has the tendency to judge his looks based on his own perception of how he compares against other guys.

But a woman will judge that same guy’s looks based on her own perception of how he compares to himself.

Now, what does that mean?

It means a girl looks at your potential, and then judges you based on that.

If you have a bad looking, ragged, uneven bearded face, a girl isn’t going to think:

“He’s not as clean shaven as that other guy.”

No. She’s going to think:

“He needs to shave. He’ll look better if he does.”

The same thing goes for your hairstyle, your skin-complexion, your clothes, and so on.

Everything about how you look will be analyzed by girls and then compared to how you could look, not compared to how other guys look.

This is the psychological way that girls care about looks.

Don’t believe me? Go ask one.

You see, in reality girls care about looks only in comparison to yourself. The better you work with what you’ve got, the better looking she will think you are. She will see that you are fulfilling your potential, and that demonstrates value which is very attractive.

That means whenever a girl is interacting with you or watching you interact with someone else, she’s judging you based on her perception of your potential.

She’s judging you on you.

Do girls care about looks just like we do? Yes, but they do it in much more thoughtful and considerate manner. You’ll rarely see a man look at an overweight woman and say:

“She’d be smoking hot if she lost about 80 pounds.”

However that is exactly how girls think when it comes to appearances. They look at a person’s full potential – for what someone could be – and use that as their guide.

To keep it 100; they’re just better at this than we are.

There could be a super hot guy standing right next to you, but if you look and act like you’ve got everything together and you’re completely loving yourself and the skin you’re in, she’s going to be looking at YOU.

Also, if you have some game you can even beat better looking guys in a direct competition over a girl.

Still don’t believe me?

Let’s take a look at family, relatives and close friends. No doubt you’ve got a few that you can honestly say that you love or “got love for.”

Now think about them. Do their looks have anything to do with how you feel about them?

They don’t, do they?

If a prettier looking Grandma came along, would you feel any less love for your own grandma?

Of course not!

This is how girls think. They are attracted to character – to personality – and in regards to the way that girls care about looks, they are most attracted to personal potential and fulfillment of your own potential.

You’re a person, not a product off an assembly line. There aren’t standards and specifications.

Everyone comes in their own color, shape and size.

Girls know this. They don’t care how you look compared to the next guy.

They care about how you look compared to how you COULD look.

Could you be dressed a little better? Groomed a little better? Better posture? Better physique? Smile more?

That’s what girls look for in a guy’s appearance; your own fulfillment of your own potential.

This is why two guys can both be considered “10’s” on the looks scale.

If value is comparative, how could two 10’s possibly co-exist?

Because to women a man’s value is not graded on a curve. Your value is not determined by another, it’s only determined by yourself.

If a girl looks at you and thinks you don’t value yourself highly and are neglecting to strive for what you could be, she won’t be interested. If she notices that you hold yourself in high regards and are doing everything possible to reach your ceiling, she’ll be feeling you.

Girls care about looks less than value

Whether you want to believe it or not, girls correlate looks with value. They do this directly, instantly and brutally.

How you present yourself is a direct reflection about how you perceive yourself. If you’re hunched over like you’re cowering, girl’s will pick up the message that you’re insecure.

This is what your looks really boil down to:

Simply a message about your attitude towards yourself.

The better care you take of yourself, the higher it speaks of your self value, because you are showing that you feel the worth of your own body and you want to take care of it by eating right, exercising, and even celebrating your own body by adorning it with nice threads, grooming and stylish apparel.

This is why you style your hair. It’s why you pay money for cool looking shoes. It’s why you work out to stay in shape.

If you see yourself as worth it and deserving of being the best you, then you want to communicate that through your appearance.

That’s the real way that girls care about looks. It’s much more about self creation than genetics.

This really makes total sense when you think about it. If a woman sees that you give it 100% when it comes to being the best looking man you can be, she’ll have reason to believe you’ll put in the effort to be the best boyfriend, best husband, best father and best financial provider that you can be as well.

That’s why it bothers me when some guys talk about girls being stupid and illogical.

Sure, they don’t think as logically as we do, but sometimes (especially in the social aspects of life) logic just isn’t the right tool for the job. Women are truly fascinating creatures, and the more I study them the more respect and admiration I have for them.

Back on topic about self creation versus genetics:

Brad Pitt isn’t good looking because he was born that way. He could easily be a 400lb fat slob who smells like a sewer simply by living a sedentary, self loathing lifestyle. His genetics would be the same, but he would not be good looking at all. Instead, he puts in the effort and tries to look his best.

He believes in his own self worth and value, so he lives a lifestyle that involves working out, dressing nice and detail specific grooming. Visually, he looks attractive, but the real reason he’s attractive to women is because he is fulfilling his potential, which demonstrates value.

You see, it all comes together in the end.

If you’ve willing to make it come together, that is.

Speaking of coming together, did you know that you can make ANY girl fall in love with you?

You can! Learn how to do it here: “Rising Star Seduction Program”

Go have a look. You won’t regret it!

Your friend,

Julian Webb

About the author

Team Author


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  • Nice post – thanks. ‘Her mouth can lie but her eyes can’t’ is so true. Only thing is – if a girl is lying to you a lot… I wouldn’t spend a ton of time trying to teach her not to lie – I’d peace her out – Sayonara!

  • Lol I stumbled upon this article randomly, but I found this actually quite true from a girls perspective. Though, I personally think very differently than most girls, but this pretty much explains how the majority think. I on the other hand, am the rare few that are the opposite haha.
    This actually helped me understand girls I’m around better too. I never quite jivved with them as easy as guys thinking.
    Im a tomboy.
    But that makes me think,…guys are very comparative with us then compared to girls thinking haha eek.

  • The 3 second rule is good for overcoming fear of approaching, I used to get myself rejected on purpose to overcome that fear. After the fear is gone the 30 second rules seems better, especially because you don’t seem desperate. I usually give a simple hello, talk about something I noticed around where shes at, introduce myself and shake her hand, then have a conversation. I haven’t mastered getting contact information yet though.

  • Yea, the other thing is some women are ‘closed’. Its like your talking to them and then they’re ready to talk to someone else. I usually talk to a different woman when this happens…I guess the time between getting rejected and talking to a new woman I can be contemplating what I did right and wrong in that interaction.

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