Knowing where to go and what to do on a first date, as well as how to deal with relationships, is crucial if you want to truly be successful. In this section you will learn all about dating, long and short term.
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Conversation Tips - Learn the necessary conversation techniques and become great at talking to women. Learn what to say to women and how to say it in many critical situations.
Flirting Tips - It is vital for any player to know how to flirt with women if he wants to pick them up. Learn all of the best flirting tips to improve your skills at flirting with women.
Inner Game Tips - Learn tips that will teach you how to be confident around women and how to believe in yourself. An often overlooked, yet very important aspect of the game.
Outer Game Tips - These tips are for learning how to act around women, and can teach you what to do to make women want you. Learn how to behave around women.
Lifestyle Tips - The way you live your everyday life has a greater impact on relationships with women than you think! These tips will help you lead a lifestyle women are drawn to.
Dating Tips - Use this section to master the art of dealing with relationships, how to handle the first date, where to go on a date, and many other great strategies for dating women.
User Submitted Tips - These tips have been sent in by players wanting to add their knowledge to the Becomeaplayer.com resource. Don't forget to send in your own tips as well!
The Dating Tips...
Control what you can
This one of the most simple tips that I have to offer, but it is sadly one of the most overlooked. Too many guys find a girl that they like and then go crazy, worrying all the time about whether or not she likes them back. Ironically enough, this is all too often the very reason that the girl will not be attracted to them. When you spend your time worrying about things out of your control, such as whether or not a certain girl likes you, you lose focus of the things that you can control and you become a boring person that has nothing to offer a woman. The only thing that you have control over is yourself, never forget that. Make yourself the best person that you can be, which includes working out, finding hobbies, and doing everything possible to lead a happy and fun life. If your happiness is dependant on women, then you are putting your life in someone else's hands. Remove all the guesswork, take control of your life, and make sure that it's great: girls find that extremely attractive. - GoinPhoenix
The Best Way To Ask Out A Girl
What is the best way to ask out a girl? Here’s my answer to this nagging question: the best way to ask out a girl depends on who she is, what you have in common with her, where you met her, how you interact with her (daily, weekly or rarely). Let me illustrate by presenting some scenarios. A girl you met in the dog park: The best way to ask out a girl you met in the dog park on a weekend is to plan activities you can do together when you meet again next Sunday. These activities must revolve around your common denominator… dogs! A girl you regularly ride with in the subway: You can exchange numbers with her so you can send SMS messages when you need her to reserve a seat for you or vice versa. Since you see each other on a daily basis, you can ask her to share a cup of coffee with you somewhere near your regular meeting place (the subway). A girl you met at a friend’s party: You ask your friend to introduce you to the girl and you openly flirt with her, hinting that you want to spend more time with her away from the crowd. You find out later that she takes the early shift, so she can’t schedule an all-nighter with you. You take her number and give her yours so you can plan to meet later, when you both have the time. Do you see a pattern here? A girl will only agree to a date with you if you take some factors into consideration like the things you have in common and the logistics of the date. With that said, there’s no cookie cutter way to dating a girl. You always have to personalize your technique to suit the girl you want to date. - Flirt Mastery
Her Place/Your Place
It's pretty simple really, but how do you get the F-Close most of the time? Well, it's all about where the actual date is taking place. If you for some reason don't have a place of your own or you decide not to take her out on a date in your town then you'll most likely find it difficult to get the F-close in. I mean you could just take her to a school in your car or some park but really, when you're a bit older that tends to get dangerous. (Cops pulls up as your pulling up your pants and the condom you just used is quickly jammed into your nice new jeans) So basically, the solution is to stay near her place or stay near your place. If you live in an apartment in a nice city take her for dinner or drinks near your place and then tell her you want to show her something in your apartment. Invite her up for more drinks. The key is that your place is nearby. If you're out of town and near her place then ask her if there are anymore bars around her place that you could check out. If not just offer to walk her home. If that doesn't work ask to use the bathroom or make some excuse up. (Yea.. the PATH train isn't working at this hour.. {Runs 24/7 but she doesn't know} and use that excuse to stay). Bottom line, keep the date close to home base. - Wood
Paying
It goes one way or the other. If you don't want to pay for it all then let her pay for half. Shell usually bring this up. You can say yes/no. Its up to you. But, if you decide to pay then you always have to pay. You also have to pay for everything. So when you go out and pay for a bottle or something like that at a table, you have to pay for that and offer it to the friends as well. You're basically stuck in this position. If you don't pay you'll be lowering your value. So any shots anything at all has to be given to her friends and to anyone who's part of the table really. You cant leave anyone out, and offering drinks only serves to up your value in any of her friends perspectives. This works particularly well when you first meet them since they are usually there to approve of you. Point is, you have to figure out which guy you're going to be. I tend to fall into the pay for everything mode which is a pain at times. But its also the easiest way to gain value immediately. I just grit my teeth and take the blow to my wallet. Decide which one you want to be early. - Wood
Dinner Dates Wood Style
Pick a a cool place. Something has to be notable, chicks love to talk about these things. So whether its a trendy sushi place, an expensive posh thing, or a bar that's on the rooftop.. you should pick something that will make an impression on her. If you're 21 & up you should figure out if shes the white wine type or red. See if she can handle what you like though preferably. Bottom line here is you are the one picking the drink. You are taking control. Find your selection for the night quickly. Don't be an asshole about this, you know what you like and you should choose and not mess around. That's what chicks do. Be assertive in this like you are at all points in your life. Then find out what she is having and order for her. Assertiveness/Confidence is your greatest weapon. Hopefully you have finished your meal with no significant obstacles and you were smart and didn't pick something messy or that could get stuck in your teeth. Now its time for the bill. My method is if they are significantly older than you are you have to pay. No matter what they say. If they are younger or close to your age and ask to pay you have to say no its okay. If she offers more than once to pay though, then you tell her ok if shes comfortable with it. Next, invite her over to your place since obviously you picked a place near yours! Crucial! Invite her over to 'show' her something or to have a drink. Never, Never, Never NEVER choose a movie for a first date. Honestly, its a dead end. Don't do it. I don't care how old you are. - Wood
The Phone Call
3 days. Christ came back after 3 days for a reason. To teach us the 3 day rule. Once you hit 3 days, call her up. Breathe. Its very important to keep taking steady long breaths because this is how people get nervous. If you disrupt your breathing then your heart also speeds up and you'll sound nervous. Just clear your head and breathe. Be ready for her to answer. When she does remember you are calling her to set up a date, not to talk. Talking is for chicks and AFC's or girlfriends. Start off by asking her past few days have been. Show some interest and then go for the kill. Try not to let her pick a day, but its not the biggest deal if she does. Your best Fatality move here is just telling to come out with you on lets say Friday. Tell her 9pm Friday, I know this great place. This kind of assertiveness is a weapon of mass destruction. After you set it up wrap up the conversation and tell her you'll see her soon. As for voicemails and texts.. don't do it. DON'T do it. Save this if she doesn't answer the first time for the next call. This is a simple way to see if she ignoring you without seeming obsessed with her. 1 call could be coincidence.. so if she doesn't answer the 2nd time you can leave a message and you'll be fine. Make it short though. Less is more. - Wood
Go for the gold
The most frustrating thing possible is to settle for less than you truly want. When you look for a woman, your standards should be high! Don't let a lack of success deter you from your goal and force you to settle for an average woman. Instead, work harder and accept nothing less than what you deserve, the best. You will never be able to enjoy what you have, because it's not what you aimed for in the first place. You will never be content, and that is the ultimate defeat. Remember, it is always better to aim high and miss than to aim lower and reach your mark. - GoinPhoenix
Focus on right now
Stop thinking about defining a relationship with her, and just focus on being fun, flirtatious, and playful. You should never worry about `getting` a chick or being her future boyfriend. Just enjoy flirting with her in the moment, with no concerns about where the relationship stands or where it may be going. As a result, girls will text and call you constantly. Why? It`s because you do not come with `strings attached`. This makes you not needy, and fun to be with, as you bring no ultimatums or responsibilities to the table. And you do that by focusing on the interaction between you two only, without ever thinking about the end result. There IS NO end result. It`s always about the NOW, not the LATER. - Player87
Rapport
Rapport is very important but at the same time does not have to be extremely complicated. The reason that rapport is so important is that you have to establish a true connection with a girl to ensure that there is a foundation in place to build the rest of your game upon (for both physical escalation and future dates). If it's not in place, you'll encounter a lot of problems with last-minute resistance and flaking, because she will think of you as more of a stranger than someone that she shares a emotional bond with. Without rapport, there is no success. - Player87
Be prepared
Your ultimate goal when you go out on a date with a girl is to get her back to your place, so before you go out to meet her or pick her up it is always a good idea to get your crib prepared for her to be there. Make sure to have everything clean and neat, vacuum your carpet, get all dirty dishes out of the sink, take the trash out if it is overflowing, put everything in it's proper place and by all means hide any porno that you have somewhere where she will NEVER come across it :) It's also a good idea to have a slow jams cd in your stereo so that you can put it on easily when the two of you arrive without having to fumble through your cd case and waste a bunch of good foreplay time. If you like old school stuff some good music to use is Marvin Gaye, New Edition or Teddy Pendergrass. If you like newer stuff then Jamie Foxx, 112 or Jagged Edge will get the job done nicely. You will also want to set up the lighting in your place before you leave in order to set an automatically cozy and sexual atmosphere the moment you walk in the door with her. The best way to do this is to have at least a few lamps in your crib that either fade to your liking or have pre-set low, medium and high settings. When you leave, put the lamps on the lowest possible setting so they only light up the immediate area around them without lighting up the entire room. The combination of the lights and music creates the perfect setting for things to go exactly the way you want them to, and you and her will be "bumpin' uglies" in no time.
56 seconds, 57, 58, 59... DONE
Ever have the problem of ejaculating too early while having sex? If so, try this little trick I've found to be very effective in stopping this embarrassing event from happening: While your having sex and you begin to feel like your about to become a one minute man, count silently from 1 to 100, and when you finish start back at 1 again. This effectively takes your mind off sex, which makes you not as aroused. For more tips and secrets like this one, have a look at Robert Irwin's Sexual Mastery, which contains recent scientific and clinical research that has revealed truly new and powerful information and techniques for increasing your (and your partner's) sexual performance and enjoyment.
Damn, I think that I forgot my...
After having a good date with a girl and you are back at her place, try to leave something behind that will remind her of you. Leaving a shirt behind is what I recommend, because it will probably smell like your cologne and the smell will make her think of you. This also gives you an excuse to see her again. When she calls to tell you that you've forgotten something, act like it is no big deal and say that you'll pick it up next time you get together.
Awww, he's so romantic!
After you go on a date with a woman you are very interested in, and if you feel that everything on your date went very well, send flowers to her workplace. Women love to show off when a guy they are dating does something romantic for them, and their work is the absolute best place for them to show off. Most women are either good friends or highly competitive with their female co-workers, which is a win-win situation for them when they receive a gift while at work. Chances are she will give you a call the moment she gets the flowers, try it. To balance out the equation and make it seem like you aren't a needy guy, you can joking act like "Aww no, I meant to send those to someone else!" Say it with a smile and you are as good as gold. Also, only do this once, as making a habit out of spoiling a woman will lead to her either taking advantage of you or expecting you to continue that behavior forever.
Clever ideas, don't you just love 'em
When you want to give a gift to a girl, try this little trick: Tape a note to the glovebox in your car that says "Open me" and put the gift inside (works well with a single rose). Don't say anything about it once you pick her up and you are riding along in the car, let her find it for herself. Remember to buy some rubbers while you are getting the rose, your gonna need them. This tip follows the same rule as the one posted above: it's single serving and should only be done once. In addition, never use both of these tips back-to-back!
Here, eat this :)
Feed her chocolate! You might not know it, but chocolate is a mild aphrodisiac. This means that chocolate triggers emotions in our mind related to love and attraction. For instance, if a woman is thinking about you while she is eating a hershey's bar, she will feel more attracted to you than she normally would. With this in mind, try to feed her chocolate while you are with her. The best way to accomplish this is: Stop at a gas station to fill up on gas, and when you go inside to pay (don't use credit card outside) come back out with a candy bar and say "I thought you might like this, but if you don't want it I'll eat it".
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