Ah, getting a girl’s number! One of the oldest tricks in the book, every guy in the world has tried to get a girl’s number at one time in his life. There have been countless conversations in bars between guys trying to do it and countless dollars spent by frustrated men looking for how to do it. Luckily, all of the information you will ever need to know to get a girl’s number is in this step-by-step guide, for free! We’ve done the work for you and separated it into five easy steps that will work for anyone. Getting a girl’s number is just the first step out of many on the road to a successful hook-up or relationship, though, but it all starts here. You’ve got to walk before you can run and you’ve got to know how to approach and get a number before you get laid. Learn the basics here and reap the rewards later!
1. Set Yourself Straight
There is an old saying that goes, “Failing to prepare is preparing to fail.” Set yourself up for success and don’t fall behind before you even start talking to the girls. The most important thing for you to have straight is your mindset. You can’t fake this part, as it shows in your actions. Don’t try and think like an alpha male, be an alpha male! Assume that the girl wants you more than anything and that she’s begging you to approach. Secondly, have fun and enjoy yourself! If you’re stressed, you will never succeed. Don’t be focused on whether or not she will like you, focus on whether or not you will like her! Putting her on a pedestal in your mind will give yourself a huge mental roadblock before you even begin talking to her. If she knows that you’re obsessing over her, she’ll figure that if she can get you drooling over her, she can at least get someone much better interested! Place value on yourself above everything else, for you are the important one. There are millions of women out there better than the one you’re going to talk to, but there will only ever be one you! You should be the one on your pedestal, not her. Once you have your mind right and are ready to have fun, you’ve got all the tools you need for a successful approach!
Always look your best and feel your best. You can’t change your natural appearance, and that doesn’t matter. Work with what you have, because you can clean yourself up and dress nicely. When you look your best, you feel your best. Positive energy is the most important ingredient of a pick-up, so help yourself all you can!
2. Preparation
This is the time for action! Contrary to popular belief, the pick-up starts before you ever approach a woman. When you first spot an attractive woman, you shouldn’t wait to make your move. When you’re first starting out, it’s best to use the “three second rule,” and approach within three seconds of spotting the hottie you’re going to snag. This gives you no time to talk yourself out of the approach and makes it spontaneous, a necessary ingredient for meeting women. Don’t be the guy who follows her around store after store in the mall for three hours, this will only get you picked-up on her creep radar!
It all begins when you spot the woman. When you see her, start warming her up to your approach immediately! The two most important things to do in this stage are to smile and make eye contact! When someone smiles at you, you hardly ever fail to smile back. A smile always makes anyone’s day better, so give her a grin! This breaks the ice perfectly and she is naturally inclined to respond positively to you. While you’re smiling, be sure and make eye contact with the girl of your choice. If she holds the eye contact, it’s a sure sign that she is interested! Not making eye contact before (and during) your approach is a sign of insecurity. Own the set and take what’s yours!
3. Initiate
Once you’ve successfully broken the non-verbal ice, it’s time to finally approach. This is where almost all men have a horrible time and make most of their mistakes. Guys come to websites by the millions every day looking for the one “Holy Grail” opener that will melt any woman’s heart and panties the instant you meet them. Needless to say, they’re only wasting their time and setting themselves up for disappointment, because they don’t know a big secret. As a matter of fact, we’ll even let you in on this secret: the opener you use doesn’t matter at all! Over 90% of communication is non-verbal, your body language, the way you say things, and the confidence behind the words you speak are infinitely more important than the words themselves. The only purpose of an opener is to get your foot into the door and start a conversation. As far as I’m concerned, there are only two openers, ones that get you into a conversation and ones that don’t. Don’t use a corny pick-up line, keep things simple! There is no opener that will win you a girl by itself, but stupid things get you blown out immediately. Walk confidently, speak loudly, and game with conviction! This will get you farther than any line in the history of the universe. Use a time constraint when you begin talking to the girl, as you don’t want her to think that you’re going to hang around bugging her forever (there’s an example of this below).
There are many openers, choose whatever you feel works best with you:
Opinion Openers - Ask a girl’s opinion on something to get you into conversation.
Example: “Hey! I’ve gotta get going quick, but I need a female’s opinion on something. I’m buying a gift for my sister’s birthday party; do women hate gift cards as much as men do?”
Basic Openers - Introduce yourself to her and make a funny observation on the surroundings, this is the most quick and to the point method of initiating conversation.
Example: “Hey! Did you see that guy’s rainbow shirt?! I’ll have to use you as my guide dog, since I’ve gone blind!”
When opening, always enter the set with a higher energy level than it is already at. Be enthusiastic, no one likes a boring dude!
4. Substance
This is where you actually talk with a girl and the group she is in. If she’s in a group, don’t ignore them. In fact, give more attention to the girl’s friends than the actual girl that you’re interested in. Without the approval of her friends, you’ll get nowhere. Don’t stress out about the actual conversation. Women think emotionally, unlike men. They respond to feelings. Women become attracted to a man because of how he makes her feel, not what he says to her. Focus the conversation on the woman, since girls love to talk, this should be no problem! Pick out key words out of her statements and use these to branch off to other topics when you’re out of things to say. Don’t talk badly about yourself or your job and never discuss problems with her.
Display strong body language; keep your hands out of your pockets at all times! The most important thing to remember is that you need to be playful! Women love a guy who is at ease around them and who is able to make them smile and enjoy themselves. Don’t be afraid to touch her either; play around with her and push her when she says something stupid, or tap her on arm while you’re making gestures that go along with conversation. Playful flirting like this is a must!
5. Closing
Once you’ve opened, gained the approval of her friends, and have talked with the woman for a few minutes, she will be interested and attracted to you if you’ve done everything right to this point. When she starts laughing, playfully touching you back, and doing stuff like playing with her hair or asking questions about you, it’s time to make your move. This is when the woman is into you, so take advantage of your good work! Never leave without attempting to close by either getting a number or arranging a date. You’ve got nothing to lose, and women will give out their number if you seem like a decent guy, as no one can pass complete judgment on a person based on one short conversation.
I’m going to throw a shocking guideline at you now: never ask for a girl’s number! That’s right, I said to never ask for a girl’s number. When you ask, you give her the chance to dismiss you and you put the power in her hands. Instead of asking and surrendering control of the interaction, get the number by TELLING instead of asking. Examples of this are shown below. If you feel that she is interested enough for a date, set on up one the spot before you leave. If you want to get a number and arrange things later, you can do that also. This is the final part of the approach, and the easiest if you’ve done your work so far. Remember, set up a date and get digits in a confident, in-control manner.
Examples:
“I’ve enjoyed our conversation, but I have to go meet some friends. Let’s continue it later. Would you prefer to get coffee or try out the sushi place downtown?”
“It’s been fun talking with you, we should continue this conversation. Put your number in here for me *hand her your phone*. ”
These examples illustrate the right way to close a solid interaction; you’re assuming that she will say yes and not giving her the chance to say no. Women don’t do well with power, so don’t make it hard on them Smile
If you follow those five steps, you’ll emerge with that HB 10’s number nearly every time you approach. No one gets numbers all the time, so don’t be discouraged if you slip up a couple times. Even with perfect game, there are still variables out of your hands. All you can control is yourself, so go out, have a blast, and get some phone numbers! If you need a refresher on the steps and major points, there is a summary below.
Points to Remember:
1. Set Yourself Straight
• Believe in your success
• Look sharp and feel sharp
2. Preparation
• Smile
• Make eye contact
3. Initiation
• Display strong body language, stand straight
• Speak loudly and keep your hands out of your pockets
• Approach, keep the opener simple and start the conversation
4. Substance
• Talk about the woman
• Pick out topics to talk about from her comments
• Gain the approval of the group
• Flirt playfully, don’t be afraid to make contact and touch the woman
5. Close
• Always attempt to close
• Assume that she’ll say yes
• Go for either a number or a date
The author of this article, GoinPhoenix, is a member of an elite team of seduction gurus known as The Inner Circle (TIC). To learn more about TIC, their amazing work with the Paragon Project, and to download their free 200+ page Crash Course in seduction, Click Here.
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